Thursday, September 6, 2007

"Life Begins Again?" or "It's good to not be fully awake when I have to put up with this"

Yes, it's that time of year. The time of year when I wake up at 2am on Sunday morning to catch the noon kickoff of the noon college football games. Who's playing? Don't know, Don't care. I can watch the game for one quarter and figure out who I want to root for. Of course, I have my favorites (Baylor). Did you know that Floyd Casey Stadium (where Baylor plays) is the only stadium where you can order Hot Dogs, Cokes, or a Morphine Drip, right from your seat. Special attendents hook you up and increase the dosage as the game progresses. When the game is officially over (not the same as really over, as that occurs long before halftime) they wheel you over to special buses that will take you home. Isn't that nice.
Baylor Fans don't have to worry about road games because they don't really go. If they do, they try to buy tickets in the home section and not wear Baylor colors. They play along and laugh at the people in the Baylor section. Who can blame them? They just want to experience what it feels like to be sitting with the winner.
After a road loss to TCU (27-0) on opening weekend, it does not get any easier this weekend as we host the feared Rice Owls. The athletic department had the nerve to actually schedule the Buffalo Whatevers for the next three years. Buffalo IS the worse team in Division Uno, number 119 out of 119, so losing to them would be especially traumatic. Well, maybe not. I mean after all we're not THE MICHIGAN WOLVERINES!! A bit of Trivia: The Baylor/Michigan game to start the season in 1975 was in the Guiness Book of World Records for most people to ever see a football game. I kid you not. They played to a 14-14 tie. figures.

... And for all of you Baylor, Michigan, and let's go ahead and throw in Vanderbilt while we're at it, just close your eyes and...

"Hey, can you turn up the IV just a little bit. Oh, that's much better. Doesn't the scoreboard have such pretty colors".

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